Well, it looks like getting up in the morning and committing to searching for concrete ways to love your husband or your wife. Where does he tend to be discouraged or overwhelmed? What are the daily tasks in which she could use assistance? In what special way can you communicate your affection? Perhaps an unexpected card in a lunch bag, or a delivery of flowers, or a call in the middle of the day just to say, "I love you." Maybe you communicate love by not turning on the flat-screen and being willing to talk instead. Maybe love gets communicated by fixing something broken, just because fixing it would make the other's life easier. Maybe it would be best communicated by your willingness to take over a duty that has usually fallen to the other. There is no want for opportunities to love; the issue is, do we see them and are we committed to respond to them when we do. Would your spouse call you a loving person?
From, Paul Tripp, What Did You Expect? Redeeming the Realities of Marriage, p.123-24 (emphasis added).